Oh, the cleverness of me!

Peter Pan statue in Kensington Gardens, London.

My mom recently reminded me one of my second-grade teacher's great qualities. My mom noticed that after my teacher handled a particularly sticky situation, she started to give herself positive reinforcement. Saying things like "Wow. I handled that really well! Good job, me!", my teacher complimented herself on her resourcefulness. This is the same teacher who went student to student with a jar of M&Ms, shook each student's hand, and asked her about her day or how she was feeling. This is the same teacher who had regular interviews with her students and asked each one to share a few things they were good at. If we were hesitant to say anything, she wouldn't hesitate to fill in the gaps.

My teacher was (and I'm sure she continues to be) one of the most confident people I know. When she was my teacher, she was a single mom with no spouse to celebrate her successes or compliment her ideas. But she worked with what she had - herself. Like Peter Pan, she said, in effect, "Oh, the cleverness of me!"

Our cleverness ought to be recognized, nay, demands recognition. Not everyone, especially adult women, receives recognition for what they do. This fact is to be expected, but not necessarily left unaltered. We are just as good at complimenting ourselves as anyone else. Working hard can be rewarded and encouraged by the little things we tell ourselves. Thinking "I started my day of so well by exercising! Good for me!" is much more motivating than "He doesn't even know how hard I worked this morning to look like this" or "I wonder if all the other people here know what I've been through." I'm no psychology academic, but I know from experience that our mental workings are crucial to our inertia. Go team!